About DaveSinBlackpool

DaveSinBlackpool is divorced and is seeking females for friendship or a casual relationship or a serious relationship.

Before I begin - If a guy makes the effort to create a profile, don't waste his time with an uninspiring 'Hi'!

Sitting comfortably?

Latest idea for tv ads - I walk towards the camera at an obtuse angle whilst uttering the lines: 'Involved in a messy relationship and a break-up that wasn't your fault? Call Boyfriends4U right now and get the fulfilling attention you deserve!'

Does your Zodiacal star sign tell me all I need to know about you?
Wait for it (TBBT fans already know this one) -
'Yes. That you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the Sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality' HA - I agree!

I admit to being a boots/heels & skirts guy (just can't always get them in my size) Biddum-tishh!

I'm solvent with a job, own house, car, teeth, hair, sanity, looks, charm, opinions, (and evidently, a sense of humour you might add). My house isn't untidy - I just enjoy playing those 'hidden object' games in 3D (on 'Guru' level).

I like cute animals (I've even baby-sat a skunk for two months a few years ago).

Now then, these profile engines:
Ever looked at your details field and wished you could answer it 'properly'?

Click on your [Profile] button...

SEX: "Yes please" / "Non-existent" / "I wish!" / "What's that?"

Which best describes your current situation? "Hopeless" / "Bleak" (or similar)

Eye colour? If answering 'Black', you're either a raccoon / panda (cute) or have been ambushed down too many dark alleyways.

Which best describes your hair? GONE! (OK, 'Follically-challenged')!

Do you wear glasses? NO, I EAT THEM! (Well, what else were they designed for, suppository use?)

Which best describes your body type? Saloon/Hatchback/Estate? The latter - it's in a state alright!

Select your weight: NO. I'm sick of bloody waiting!

Which best describes your alcohol consumption? 'Stupid' or 'Sensible'? Straightforward enough.

Which best describes your smoking habits? 'Burning monks again, are we?

OK, I'm no Jimmy Carr - But I AM available!

If however, you don't know the difference between there, their and they're or between ware, wear and where or your, yaw, yore and you're, then I'll just have to take you over my knee (amongst other places). Oh and yes, I AM an English teacher (qualified TEFL in my spare time).

Favourite quote: Get an inflatable doll - it'll never have a headache - no, but YOU will by the time you've finished blowing the bloody thing up!

What do you like most about where you currently live?

The prospect that I will one day leave this cul-de-sac of Lancashire! I prefer the south, thanks!

What do you enjoy most about your current job?

Considering taking up dentistry - because communicating with some of you on here is like PULLING TEETH! What, with horrid 'text-speak' and mono-syllabic responses...!

What are your favourite leisure activities?

Hmm, here we go - sitting comfortably?
Reading (history/archaeology), travel (sight-seeing and exploration), walking, car boot sales, museums, skiing (snow), computer games, tv (films, comedies, docs etc) still there? Pets/animals (Including skunk-sitting as per photo) and carnivorous plants (Pitchers, Butterworts & Sundews etc). On to that little assortment I could add DIY and maintaining the cars. Also TEFL-qualified so, I assist foreign students in that respect too.

Where in the world are your favourite places?

Besides where you are? The New Forest, Cotswolds, Salisbury Plain, Hampshire, Wiltshire, Sussex... Oh sod it, draw a line from Cirencester to Peterborough and then think 'south of this line'.

Where in the world would you love to visit?

Besides visiting the places YOU want to see? Pont du Garde, Rome, Athens (again), Ephesus, Leptis Magna, Crete, Cyprus, Macchu Picchu, Alcatraz and a thousand other locations. Then, during the second week...

What would you do on an ideal date?

Huh, I should be so...

Eh, what? Oh, right (Ahem!)

Incidentally, why do folk answer this as though the question was 'first' date when that is NOT the question - that's rhetorical by the way.

What are you looking for in a partner?

What do you mean 'IN' a partner? I'm not a bloody radiologist!

A woman in ST Albans once read my above response and suggested I'd missed a trick by not answering with "My di**" (you can guess the consonants but I'm not so arrogant as to put that on ANY site never mind this one)

What makes a good relationship?

Being with someone intelligent enough to know the difference between there, their and they're nor misspell plural forms of nouns by using apostrophes!

What makes you laugh?

Grumpy Old men/Women tv series, Doc Martin, Scrubs, Fawlty Towers, M.P.'s Life of Brian. People who complain about the state of the country but chose not to vote, Mock the Week and people who think 'Storage Hunters' is NOT staged.

What music do you like?

From Williams & Grieg to Fleetwood Mac & Kool & the Gang and onwards through Chic, the BeeGees, Shakatak, and Odyssey (seen both of those) If I think no-one can hear me, then I'll be singing along to D-Ream's "You're The Best Thing" and be equally enthusiastic when singing along to "I've got the Moo-oo-oo-oo-ooves like Jagger" Did I say 'sing'? Oh, well...

What has been the highlight of your life so far?

So far in my life? Well, you've yet to 'happen' to me, so...

What are you looking forward to in the future?

Huh, I was only born with two and neither are crystal!

Other than meeting you? Watch this space...

I was hoping to order a lifetime's supply of condoms but, they don't sell them individually. In fact, an egg has a better sex life- oh, hang on let's not do that one!

What's your favourite quote?

"Get an inflatable doll - it'll never have a headache..."

"No, but YOU will by the time you've finished blowing the bloody thing up!"